When Sober Curious Strikes Past Dry January

At first of 2025, the previous US Surgeon Common issued an advisory on the hyperlink between alcohol consumption and cancer risk. Whereas it is a sobering name to motion, there isn’t any denying that sober curiosity has elevated just lately. From Dry January to extra manufacturers creating alcohol-free drinks to the rise of mainstream mocktails, now greater than ever even informal drinkers have gotten sober curious and analyzing their relationship with alcohol.

Final 12 months in Episode 146 of the FBG Podcast, Sobriety Coach, and Founding father of Sober Wild, Krysty Krywko, Ed.D, joined our EIC Alison for an interview on sobriety. In the present day we’re persevering with this dialog with Krysty. Dry January has handed however actually not the questions on what we are able to do if we’re interested by a sober (fully alcohol free), or damp (a discount in alcohol consumption), life. 

Tam: Ought to we method consuming as all or nothing, particularly if we’re sober curious?

Krysty: I believe it’s a really private resolution, however if you happen to’re any form of an everyday drinker (that means three or 4 nights per week “simply to unwind”) then alcohol is impacting the way in which you’re feeling – mentally, emotionally, and bodily – your physique simply doesn’t know there’s one other manner. For those who’re not consuming throughout the week, however then consuming a few bottles of wine over the weekend, you by no means actually get the prospect to see how your physique and thoughts reacts to no alcohol. Anna Lembke, in her e book, Dopamine Nation: Finding Balance in the Age of Indulgence, talks about how “abstaining from our drug of alternative for at the very least 4 weeks provides clarifying behaviors. Perception that merely isn’t attainable whereas we proceed to make use of.” In different phrases, you haven’t any concept how shitty you actually really feel whenever you’re utilizing a substance that’s making you’re feeling shitty. It normally takes a number of weeks in your physique to regulate to the truth that you’re now not consuming a poisonous substance.

Tam: Are there issues/finest practices to go from Dry January to extra of a Damp February and past? 

Krysty: So, I don’t actually know the reply to that query, it actually is determined by what your motivation was for Dry January. Was the plan to simply see if you happen to may make it with out consuming for 30 days? Or had been you searching for actual well being advantages? Or did you understand that your consuming has elevated over the previous few years and you recognize you wanted to take a break?

Moderation, which is actually what Damp February is all about, doesn’t work for lots of people. For those who spend lots of time bargaining with your self every time alcohol is concerned, which results in lots of “guidelines” round your consuming, you may wish to take a step again.

You may not even pay attention to these guidelines. They’ve simply grow to be a part of your internal chatter. That chatter may sound like this:
I’m not going to drink on my own.
No consuming earlier than 5:00 p.m.
No laborious alcohol throughout the week
I’m solely going to drink white wine (or beer, or vodka, and many others.)
I can’t have greater than two drinks on per week night time.
I can’t drink greater than two nights in a row. 

The tip days of my consuming had been stuffed with elaborate and arcane guidelines that had been continually shifting as I broke one after one other. I used to be letting myself down every day, and that form of self-disappointment was like a relentless stream of micro-cuts to my soul.

Take a second and take into consideration why you’re placing so many guidelines round your consuming. You may simply resolve that it’s now not value it.

Tam: If somebody is studying this considering “I do not need an issue with my alcohol consumption however wish to take a extra conscious method to what I eat/drink,” what questions needs to be explored when interested by alcohol consumption? 

Krysty: One of many first issues we have to do is transfer away from the language round consuming and the idea that there are “drawback drinkers” after which everybody else. This results in disgrace, stigma, and judgement.

A way more helpful, and life like, mannequin to make use of on the subject of speaking about alcohol is the concept of consuming occurring on a spectrum. That’s the place the concept of “grey space drinker” emerged from, which encompasses everybody from the every-now-and-then drinker to those that are bodily hooked on alcohol. The great thing about this mannequin is that you simply don’t must hit any kind of a all-time low earlier than you’ll be able to discover your relationship with alcohol, you get to resolve at any level on the spectrum what’s best for you.

For those who’re able to get sincere with the function alcohol performs in your life, I might recommend sitting down with a pen and paper and answering the next questions. Get interested by your self, and take the time to reply truthfully. Don’t cloud your responses with disgrace, or judgement, or what your bestie goes to suppose. That is about you and the one life that you’ve, and whether or not or not you need a poisonous substance to play a job within the creation of that life. 

Is alcohol nonetheless working for me?
How is alcohol making me really feel?
What areas of my life has alcohol taken over?
Does consuming align with the particular person I’m now?
What would “future you” inform “current you” on this state of affairs?

Tam: What if our pals have gone again to consuming after Dry January, however we are attempting to proceed. Do you might have solutions/suggestions for learn how to make this a part of my way of life with my consuming pals? 

Krysty: You may want to search out new pals – haha. However, significantly, if your folks really respect and help you within the choices you make in your life, then it shouldn’t be an issue. However, in the event that they’re regularly attempting to push you to begin consuming once more, whining that you simply’re not enjoyable anymore, or that one shot of tequila gained’t do any hurt, then you definitely may must rethink who you’re spending time with. It’s essential to determine for your self what you wish to do with the time that you’ve, and the individuals you spend it with. 

Moreover, in case your good friend group is closely immersed in consuming tradition – that means most social actions revolve round alcohol – then you definitely may want to search out some new peeps that love to do various things.

Tam: Any favourite “drink” hacks to interchange that Friday night time cocktail? 

Krysty: I’m probably the most fundamental sober particular person round – and I’m pleased with consuming a seltzer on my sofa to unwind after a busy week. However, I do know that folks have completely different wants, and I get that within the early days of going alcohol-free you may want one thing a little bit extra thrilling. Fortunately, the alcohol-free market is on fireplace! There are such a lot of merchandise in the marketplace – suppose flavored seltzers, glowing teas, alcohol-free beers, wines, and spirits, kombuchas – I actually may go on and on. I’m regularly impressed on the locations the place I discover alcohol-free drinks – Goal, Dealer Joe’s, Entire Meals, common grocery shops, and native alcohol-free bottle retailers are beginning to supply such all kinds. My solely warning is be intentional when utilizing alcohol-free merchandise, particularly issues like alcohol-free wine or beer. For those who’re downing a bottle of alcohol-free wine most nights of the week, it’s form of like ripping off one bandage and placing on one other, and also you may wish to discover why you’re caught in the identical behaviors. 

Did you do Dry January this 12 months and preserve a dry or damp February? What’s your sober curious hack? ~ Tam